Day 12 of the Fast

Day 12

Gained a pound!

Last night was awful. Lied in bed for 2 hours trying to sleep, couldn’t. My mind was just so focused on food. I wanted to break the fast. Went downstairs to try and fall asleep on the couch, no luck there after 2 and a half hours. To get to the couch I go through the kitchen with cookies visible. They looked sooooo good. I could eat one, no one would have known! Besides me.

Eventually got some sleep in bed, no idea how much.

Something I have been forgetting to mention is that I’ve had a few food dreams. These dreams seemed so real and all result in my waking to think I broke the fast. After I become more awake, I realize they are just dreams.

This morning, the desire to break the fast continued. Was feeling real tired too, weak a little. Had my first “fall down” after getting up. About mid-afternoon I recovered and was feeling mostly fine. Although this evening it has been feeling like there is a healing crisis going on in my colon. Doesn’t feel good at all.

I’m definitely not breaking the fast yet. I am determined to take this till the body tells me to stop. I want to have a healthy body with a perfectly functioning GI tract, and I am not giving up until I have too. I am not. That is the only thing keeping me going at this point. I’ve been sick far too long and it is time to be well.

I know... in yoga it is everything is perfect, and it is… but it also isn’t permanent and can change. Change is what I’m creating.

Tongue is still coated, still very thirsty, throat feels coated and slightly swollen at times, had some cold moments but not too bad. Body still in pain, but I don’t feel like listing everything. And hmm… I think that is it.

Activities: ~40 minutes pranayamas, 1 and 20 minute meditation, and 10 minutes of pranayama.

Weight: 142